Friday, October 8, 2010

Long-distance dress discussions

Mom and Dad live 8 hours away. It is so frustrating to go gown shopping without her! I had to devise a way to include her in the experience without her physically being there...


It's a long drive between here and there.


The concept of simultaneous long-distance wedding bonding was something Mom and I started soon after our engagement. When a new episode of Say Yes to the Dress was on, I knew Mom would be calling any minute for our standing appointment. Watching other brides slog through mounds of white fabric and family drama allowed us to watch and learn. I pointed out gowns that were more my style so my un-traditional choices would be better received and understood.

Mom isn't techie but was willing to learn. I promised to be patient. We started out slowly on email and Gmail chat. For your enjoyment and my embarrassment, here's an actual email exchange between the two of us. (If I wasn't her daughter, an email with this much detail would have sent her running for the hills.)

I have been looking at my magazine and on line at different designers. I like Christina Wu #15417, Ella #5358 and 5356 and Maggie Sottero AD3371. Of course I have no idea what you are looking for. I just imagine that these would be beautiful on you!!! Love mom

The St Pucchi dress 440 is the one I saw in NJ. It is not at all what I thought would catch my eye but it is so cool in person. Much simpler. We shall see if it even looks good. I have an appointment on Saturday morning; R is going with me.

Here is the running list I'm using to keep track of my favorites.
Amsale: Taryn, Cecily; Blue Label: Eliana
Anjolique: 2105, 2104,
Carolina Herrera: Matisse, Winterhalter,
Christos: Desiree, Simone, Sutton, Joy, Sancerre, Gracia, Maribel; 2010 zinnia
Enzoani ("en Zone i") 2010: Eleanor, Elle, Edie, Eliana, Elloise, Esmeralda; 2009: Daisy, Daphne (dont like lace-up back), Dorothea, Dulcina, Dawn
Enzoani Love 2010: Calgary, Canberra; 2009: Brunswick, Balboa, Barbados, Berkeley
Justin Alexander: 8461
Kenneth Poole: Joyous, Ethereal
Lela Rose: Cloud 9, Library, Loft, Rooftop, Garden
Manuel Mota 2010: Terma, Trovador, Odin, Chabela, Chester
Matthew Christopher: Cirrus, Moet, Chrysler
Melissa Sweet: Fiesole, Ambrose, Lithe, Uma, Sasha, Deanna, Silvana, Olan, Cosimma, Dora (doesnt look right on me),
Monique Lhuillier: Wallis (F 09), Quinn (S 09)
Priscillia of Boston: 4403, 4502, 4511, 4209
PoB Vineyard: Brooke
PoB Reverie: Newport
PoB Jewel: JL202, JL201
Pronovias 2011: Farnes (Fashion), Fortuna & Fukien (Glamour); 2010: Genova, Marisa, Hawai, Galia, Manhatan
Reem Acra: not named
Romona Keveza: not named
San Patrick 2010: Esmirna, Esfera, Eos; 2009: Primavera, Pelicano, Perla
Vera Wang: not named
Watters Brides: Inez, Austin, Tyler, Monclova
(You may have noticed it's alphabetized and sorted by collection/year/season. I'm sick.)

Our emails back and forth got a little tedious so I suggested we try something new: tandem web-browsing. In reality, it would have been much easier on both of us if I remotely controlled her computer, but we made it through without me losing my patience too frequently.

"Click on the address bar and type..."
Address bar?
"The long white rectangle at the top."
Left or right button?
"I don't knoooooooow. I'm not using a mouse and it's second nature for me. Is Dad around?" (silently: Gaaaaaaah!)
*long pause*
"The right one."
Okay, Yahoo is giving me search results. Which one do I want?
"Are you searching in Yahoo? You are... stop. Go all the way up to the top bar. Where's Dad?"

To prepare for my return visit to Priscilla, we perused the virtual racks of gowns I earmarked as favorites (in above email). Also showed her the St Pucchi gown, which threw her for a loop since I was "no lace, no thanks" before. Stupid wedding is making me contradict myself...

My sister/maid of honor reviewed the Priscilla bridesmaid gowns with Mom pointing out which BM R tried on and liked. Her tastes leaned toward heavier fabrics (satin) and more formal or clubby silhouettes. Until I found a dress, we couldn't narrow down their picks so no point starting that loaded conversation early. Their visit in June was much anticipated and I couldn't wait to knock out some big decisions.

How did you include far-flung family members in your wedding planning?

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